WIT Updates the Culture Code: Snippet #3: Safety is Belonging

Last month we introduced The Culture Code’s three big skills that create successful groups:

1. Build Safety,
2. Share Vulnerability, and
3. Establish Purpose.

Safety is created through a steady stream of belonging clues, which are regular interpersonal indications that the group values each member. Within a safe environment colleagues then start safely sharing vulnerable moments, addressing issues, and creating opportunities for everyone to grow.

Coyle illustrates this in chapter 4, p. 50-55, telling the story of the day after a bad loss (with lots of missed shots and turnovers) for the San Antonio Spurs basketball team in 1994. The team gathers in the gym for a post-game meeting, the coach (Gregg Popovich) walks in, and rather than exploding- takes extra care to connect with each player; greeting, chatting, mock wrestling, whatever feels right for each person, before launching into the group meeting. And then, instead of playing the game tape as they had expected, he plays a CNN documentary on the 50th anniversary of the Voting Rights Act. He engages the players and assistant coaches in a discussion of that issue, what would they have done back then, how events unfolded, how the country struggled and changed. Only after they had re-established their strong sense of community did he shift the discussion to feedback about the game. Tough, truthful feedback. Feedback that was necessary if they were going to learn what went wrong and hopefully not repeat it the next game. Coyle then brings in research about how to deliver tough, truthful feedback that actually strengthens the team. On p. 56-57, he covers what a team of academic psychologists called “magical feedback”. Feedback that resulted in a significant future effort and performance boost. This is it: “I’m giving you these comments because I have very high expectations, and I know that you can reach them.” Coyle goes on to explain that this feedback contains “a burst of belonging cues.” “1. You are part of this group. 2. This group is special; we have high standards here. 3. I believe you can reach these standards. These signals provide a clear message that lights up the unconscious brain: Here is a safe place to give effort.”

That’s a lot to think through! Is our culture reinforcing a sense of safety? Do our performance feedback practices convey belonging messages? Are we aware of differences in how the diverse people on our teams are interpreting the belonging cues we are sending out? Are we hitting the right notes for everyone, or do we need to update that part of our culture code?

As we go about our regular work, we need frequent reminders that we are in a safe environment, part of an important group, and that our leaders and colleagues believe we can achieve at a high standard. When we don’t get those reminders we disconnect, disengage, and our performance might drop below what we are truly capable of. If we can hear or deliver tough, truthful feedback and avoid feeling or creating defensiveness or disappointment, we can strengthen our teams. If we supervise others, structuring our feedback to include these belonging cues can be a very powerful way to boost our staff retention, and boost performance. Not a bad return for a simple approach!

SUNY Women in Technology (WIT) and SICAS are collaborating to bring a regular culture code snippet to the SICAS Center Newsletter.

Want more regular ideas for increasing gender diversity in technology? Join SUNY Women in Technology (WIT) listserv, send an email to: lyris@ls.suny.edu with the phrase “subscribe suny-wit” as the body of the message. (Subject is optional)

Have an idea for a snippet? Email Holly Heller-Ross